Week 6 Tarot Spread for Autumn: The Hanged Man Season (#TarotReading #LePsychoTarot #52WeekProject)

My friend Diane sent me a link to this reading from the Llewellyn website.  I thought it looked interesting and decided to use it as my spread for this week.  I find the message the cards have given me to be fascinating (of course I would, it’s about my life 😉)

Pile One:
Top Card: The Hanged Man Question: What do I currently need to let go of and release in my life?  8 of Cups
Bottom Card: An additional message from The Hanged Man. 7 of Swords Rx

Pile Two:
Top Card: The Chariot Question: Where should I put my focus for moving forward?  3 of Cups
Bottom Card: An additional message from The Chariot.  9 of Cups

Pile Three:
Top Card: Ancestors Question: Advice from the Ancestors.  Ace of Cups
Bottom Card: More advice from the ancestors.  King of Coins/Earth.

The 8 of Cups is showing me that what I need to release is my emotional connection to things which meant something in my past but no longer resonate for me. One of the first things that comes to mind is my doll collection. I have a rather large collection of Barbie and other fashion dolls and they haven’t sparked Joy in quite some time. It’s time for me to let them go so I can make room in my life for something new. I also think this refers releasing any lingering guilt about the situation with my brother-in-law. Intellectually, I understand that what I’m doing is not only the right thing, it’s the best thing. However that doesn’t mean I’m not occasionally hit with twinges of regret and frustration that I have to make this decision; that I was left to clean up this mess. The addition of the seven of Swords reversed suggests to me that the guilt I’m taking on isn’t mine to bear. What I need to release is feeling responsible for other people’s burdens. It’s time to start reclaiming my own life, and the only way I can do this is to stop carrying guilt, sorrow, and emotional entanglements that hamper me from moving forward.

The 3 of Cups shows me that my focus should be on finding what sparks joy in my life; finding new friends and social connections that help me enjoy and celebrate what awaits me down this road. Instead of saying no to things, I need to start saying yes and open myself up to the fun and happiness that can bring. This seems to be even more reinforced by the 9 of Cups, which certainly suggests feeling emotionally fulfilled and having your wishes come true. It’s time for me to take control and steer my path along the road that will bring fun, joy, happiness, and emotional fulfillment.

My ancestors seem to be reinforcing the message abov by giving me the Ace of Cups. Once again, I get a sense of reconnecting with my heart; rediscovering things that bring me joy and a sense of contentment and happiness. It is enhanced by the King of Coins, which tells me that once I find my emotional core and reconnect with my inner dreams, live a more heart centered life, I will finally realize my own worth and feel better able to deal with the practical day-to-day realities. I will become the ruler of my life; become more grounded, practical, and learn to appreciate and care for my body as well as my heart, mind and soul.

This reading has been illuminating in many ways; reinforcing some things I already knew. It’s helped me fine tune where I need to channel my energies as well as come closer to accepting other things which I’ve known for some time but resisted.

#ChattingwithTarot – 10 of Pentacles, Ace of Cups Rx + Knight of Cups Rx (#Dreamkeepers #Tarot)

Today I enjoyed a cuppa Harney & Sons Malachi McCormick blend while chatting with my ancestors. We had quite the chat.

Their message, “Nitwit! You’re missing the point! Instead of looking at the whole picture you’re focusing on details. Open your eyes, look inside your heart. What you seek can’t be found without but only within.”. This was followed by a metaphorical smack upside the head.

So, clearly, I was misinterpreting my ancestors’ message as far as the 10 of Pentacles is concerned because it kept coming up. So I did something I rarely do, looked in the companion book. The first sentence was “Honor the endowment of your roots.” D’oh! 🤦 The author then goes on to discuss how we need to connect with our roots so that we can then move forward and express that energy in our lives; ground ourselves so we can soar.

That makes do much sense because one of the motivating factors that influenced my taking on a caregiver role for both my mother-in-law and brother-in-law is that’s how my mother’s family did it. That’s what I saw growing up. In her later years, my great-grandmother suffered from some type of dementia and I watched my mother’s aunts and uncles rally round and take care of her so she could stay at home. My great-grandmother wasn’t relegated to the sidelines either. Despite her inability to fully comprehend what was going on, she sat at the dinner table with us, she was there when we sang Happy Birthday, she was there for holiday celebrations. So my experience growing up was that when family members were in bad shape those that could picked up the slack. That is how I continue to live my life.

My ancestors are reminding me that this is my inheritance but it doesn’t have to be my jail cell. I can still find ways to enjoy my life; find things that bring me joy and make my spirit soar. Right now, I’m restricted to things that I can do within the house and with limited flexibility and freedom but that doesn’t mean I can’t try. The key is looking within myself and changing my perceptions. I understand that focusing on the negative just enhances it, but sometimes I forget. So, what I need to do is focus on the positive; retrain myself to fully embrace the little things in my life that make me happy. I can also be a little more patient with myself when I lose sight of this.

#ChattingwithTarot – 7 of Swords, Knight of Wands+ 10 of Cup (#Dreamkeepers #Tarot)

I think the ancestors are reinforcing their message from yesterday; reminding me that finding ways to sharpen my creative saw will come from my heart and spirit, not my mind.  My default mode tends to be overanalyzing and trying to be logical about things but in this situation that would probably prove more obstacle than beneficial.  If I try to be rational and logical I risk missing what will make me happy and fall into what makes sense.  

The mask on the woman in the 7 of Swords reinforces the idea that I hide behind my intellect.  I logic myself into and out of situations and that won’t serve me well here. She even holds the swords against her body as though her intellect can be armor against potential dangers.  Instead of trying to cover myself in armor, I need to find my quest, follow my heart (or my bliss, to invoke an overused cliche).   I need to open myself up to new possibilities and risk being vulnerable.  This is further reinforced by the positions of the cards.  The woman in the 7 of Swords is looking away from the other two cards while the Knight of Wands faces the woman on the 10 of Cups and offers her a rose.  It’s interesting that the woman on the 7 of Swords wears a dress and shoes that remind me of a dancehall costume and the Knight seems to be using the armor as a shield to hide his more traditional suit.  The woman on the 10 of Cups is draped in a diaphanous scarf that barely covers anything.  She is exposed, vulnerable and open as well as confident and content.  She looks down at the cups with fondness as though the memory of the joy they brought her was worth any sacrifice.  She is exposed and vulnerable but doesn’t seem weak or frightened.

Of course, I mistrust being vulnerable and unprotected.  In the past, it has proven to be dangerous and detrimental to my well-being.  However, I am no longer that person.  I think I can face the world without my protective coating and manage to survive, and even thrive upon, whatever is aimed my way.

#ChattingwithTarot – 2 of Peppermills Rx, Queen of Peppermills Rx + 6 of Hats Rx (#Wonderland #Tarot)

My ancestors message for me today:

“Find an outlet for your energy and creativity before you become bitchy, embittered and unpleasant. Reclaim your crown, your passion and your self. Revisit creative outlets that brought you joy in the past but don’t get lost in “the good old days”. They probably weren’t as golden as your memory paints them.”

#TarotDaily – Queen of Wands + Ace of Cups (#AllHallows)

I’ve been giving a lot of thought to making changes in my life – to my blog, my online handle and my “career”. I’ll probably write a longer post about that in the coming days but this reading consolidates what I suspected. It’s time to get back to who I really am and what I really enjoy.

I can’t disconnect my creative energies from my heart. It’s difficult for me to try to earn money doing something I love. I realize that might sound strange but I work at things I do well not necessarily things about which I’m passionate. My salary supported my passions, my passions didn’t help me earn money. When I “have” to do something I love it becomes a chore and sucks the joy out of it.

#TarotDaily – 7 of Pentacles Rx + 8 of Cups (Radiant WS)

TarotHunter’s Salt Rounds:

  • In the past you’ve focused so much on your achievements that you didn’t consider whether you were happy about them. Now it seems as though all those accomplishments leave you unsatisfied and emotionally unfulfilled. It might be time to leave them behind and seek out what will satisfy your heart and soul.
  • You’ve been resting on your laurels; letting yourself coast on past glories. This isn’t necessarily bad, but it is not very challenging or satisfying. Maybe it’s time to reprioritize and seek out new challenges that will make your heart & spirit sing.
  • You’re not putting any effort into things anymore. You continue to do the work but your heart isn’t in it. Your enthusiasm has left the building. Maybe it’s time to revisit the things that you love in life and reprioritize. Find ways to become more enthusiastic and experience joy in what you do and what you accomplish.

#TarotDaily – Devil Rx + 5 of Coral (#Pholarchos)

Her melancholy poured from her instrument. Her sadness shadowed her like a cloak. Although she was doing what she loved it was overshadowed by regret. She could have been doing this so much sooner if only she hadn’t let her own inner demons and the negative comments of others deter her; undermine her confidence; hold her prisoner; worm their way into her brain.

She paused for a second, shaking off those negative thoughts. That was all in the past now. she was moving forward and needed to focus on her future; no longer shackled to the past. She had found bliss and planned to treasure it.

#TarotDaily – Fool + 2 of Wands (Guardian)

TarotHunter’s Silver Bullets:

  • Celebrate what gives you joy and find ways to share it with the world.
  • Start a new journey that will help you find creative partnerships and new methods of creative expression.
  • Shout it to the world – you are free and foolish! Let the message reach those too afraid to take risks. Help them start their own journey.

#TarotDaily – Princess of Wands + 8 of Coins (Toscano)

TarotHunter’s Silver Bullets:

  • Focus your creative energies and consider what you’ve already achieved in your life before moving onto a new path.
  • Revisit past passions to find new inspiration. Let who you were guide who you may become.
  • Are your accomplishments becoming more of a burden than a reward? Maybe it’s time to strip back to your bare bones and explore who you were and how these achievements serve you now.

Passions – what makes life worth living

Passion, excitement, enthusiasm, joy.  The other day I realized how absent these emotions have been in my life lately.  While chatting with a friend about hobbies it hit me that I haven’t lost myself in any of my hobbies for quite some time.  I collect and play with Barbies and similar fashion dolls but I haven’t redressed a doll in over a year.  I collect and use Tarot decks but I haven’t really played with my decks the way I once did.  I have more books in my TBR pile than I can possibly finish in this lifetime.  I have a list of recipes I want to try but instead, default to the same 10  What the hell is wrong with me?  I’m not sure but I do have a few ideas.
During the conversation with my friend, I realized that I’ve suppressed my excitement and passion because it became painful.  Seeing others who shared my passions being able to explore and enjoy theirs while I was stuck in caregiver mode sucked.  It made me envious and bitter so I must have decided on some level that if I didn’t want to become a bitter, bitchy (okay, more bitchy) person then I needed to distance myself from online groups and boards or else my envy would chew me up and spit me out.
Unfortunately, that also meant that I dampened my affect across the board.  I stayed in a middle position to avoid letting the negative stuff overwhelm me but it meant I didn’t really enjoy the positive stuff either.  I think in clinical terms it might be considered depression.  Luckily I realized that it’s a situation depression and not due to anything major.  That means I could treat it on my own – because gods forbid I should see help for anything.  I’m kinda stubborn that way.  I like to blame it on my Capricorn Moon.
So what is my solution?  Nothing especially groundbreaking.  I made myself a promise that I would consciously choose to engage in some of my hobbies.  For example – I re-committed myself to posting my daily Tarot card pulls at least 4 times each week.  I promised myself I would post something to my blog once a week.  I am determined to journal at least once a week (but preferably more).  There are small, simple and doable steps that I know I can achieve.  Once I’ve consistently done these for a few weeks I’ll add more or change them.  I also want to start reading books on journaling and finding your life purpose but I’m not making that part of this commitment.  I have also promised myself that I won’t spend money on hobbies/crafts for which I already have a wide range of materials that I have not used yet (such as my coloring books and composition notebooks). 
None of this is especially innovative or mind-blowing.  It might not be amazing, impactful or especially transformative for anyone else.  For me, this was quite an epiphany.  Sometimes it the small wake up calls in life that have the most long-lasting and beneficial results.