Week 15 Sesame Street’s Inner Child Spread (#TarotReading #StolenChildTarot #52WeekProject)

1. What would you like to tell me? 10 of Zephyrs Rx
2. What is your favorite game? 2 of Brine Rx
3. What is your favorite thing to do? 9 of Oak Rx
4. What can I do for you? Queen of Brine Rx
5. Do you feel ignored or left out? Ace of Oak
6. What do you desire but aren’t getting? Temperance
7. How can I provide this for you now? Justice Rx
8. What do you fear most? 6 of Zephyrs
9. How can I give you what you need? 5 of Oak Rx

Stolen Child Tarot

I found this spread in Sasha Graham’s 365 Tarot Spreads book and decided it looked interesting, so I gave it a try. Sasha suggests picking a specific age when doing the reading. I decided to roll a die and came up with 15. So this is current me talking with 15-year-old me. One interesting thing about that time in my life is it’s before I met my hubby. As is true for many 15 year olds, this was a very chaotic and turbulent time in my life.

Some of the interesting insights offered by this reading include the fact that I never really felt safe and often preferred to hide to avoid being hurt. I wasn’t good with relationships and often tried to convince myself and others that I didn’t need emotional connections, despite the fact that I desperately craved them. I always felt that I didn’t fit in; that I was an oddball, so I often hid away in books. Many of the traits and behaviors I developed over the years were an effort to protect myself. They were the armor that helped me hold loneliness, pain and fear at bay. I still remain resistant to change simply because even if things are currently miserable, change always brings the potential for things to get worse. The best way that current me can help teenage me is by embracing her with all her sharp edges and flaws and showing her that it’s okay to be imperfect and that she is loved.

One of the major takeaways for this reading is that the majority of the cards are reversed which tells me that a lot of the issues brought up in this reading require me to forgive myself; to love myself. As has been said, I’m often my harshest critic. I think this reading shows that it’s time to let go of that critical perspective. It’s also interesting that there is not one Fire card in this entire reading. I find that interesting because fire is the element to which I feel most drawn and with which I’m most comfortable. So, clearly, I need to go outside my comfort zone in order to work on these issues. I think the message is that I have to stretch my boundaries and force myself to look at my past behaviors and attitudes and see them from a clearer perspective. To have a clearer idea what motivated them and stop castigating myself. It’s time to release past hurts and resentments so that I can move forward with a more healthy mindset and spirit.

Week 3 Tarot Reading – Enthrall Me (#TarotReading #SecretForestTarot #52WeekProject)

So this week I decided to do a little more exploration into The Moon card from my previous reading. In my interpretation I talked about finding something that would enroll in mesmerize me. During a conversation with a friend this week, she asked me what that might be. I realized I don’t necessarily have a clear idea at this point. So, I did what I always do I turned to Tarot to clarify things for me. And these were the cards I drew

I think the 2 of Cups reflects the loss of my husband, the loss of being in a loving, supportive, committed relationship. For so long, my life was focused on being part of a duo now it’s time to move beyond that to become a partner to myself. It reminds me of the book Imagine a Woman in Love with Herself. I think that’s what I need to become enthralled and mesmerized with – falling in love with myself. I need to learn how to be loving and supportive to myself and that’s where I need to focus my energies right now.

The 8 of Swords reversed ties into this by showing that in order to manifest this self-love I need to break free of the brambles in my path. They won’t hold me back unless I allow it. The best way for me to overcome them is to see the situation more clearly and improve my mindset. However it’s hard to see that right now because I feel as though I’m surrounded by brambles and can’t possibly find my way through. It’s rather like the original legend of Sleeping Beauty – the castle in which she slept was surrounded by an impenetrable fence of thorny brambles which presented all but those brave enough to even attempt to break through. Of course, in this situation the brambles aren’t physical they’re psychological and I’m not in need of someone else saving me. I can save myself as long as I believe in myself.

And last, but not least, we come to the Queen of Swords who shows me what will help me continue to nurture this energy. Once again, I am struck by the fact that this is a swords card, which means it’s about my mindset and my beliefs. I have the tools and the skills to cut through all this bullshit holding me back, but I have to actually use them. I can handle being alone but I also need to accept that there will be a learning curve, and cut myself some slack. I have to be realistic about what I can do alone and what I need help to achieve, and be willing to ask for that help when necessary. For me, the Queen of Swords here is about being smart and realistic and not thinking that I can tough it out.

I find it interesting that this reading starts out focusing on my emotions but then focuses on my state of mind. At the end of the day, if my mindset is negative I’m not going to be happy. It’s okay to have bad days but I need to be careful not to lose myself in the bad days. I do have faith in myself and I have the confidence that I can forge a new path going forward. It won’t be easy but I’m up to the challenge. In fact, I’m looking forward to the challenge.

Week 2 Tarot Reading (#TarotReading #SecretForestTarot #52WeekProject)

This is week two of my personal 52 week project. My goal is to do a weekly three card reading and post it to this blog. I plan to stick to it but, as we all know, sometimes life has other plans

My reading for this week: 1) What aspect of my life should I focus on this week? The Moon; 2) What will help me with this? 6 of Wands Rx; 3) What unseen factors impact this? The Empress Rx

So, the Moon shows that I need to listen to my subconscious and find what fascinates in mesmerizes me. I really love how the two figures on this card seem to be in thrall to the Moon and communicating with it on some level. I need to do the same, to trust my instincts and look deep within myself to reconnect and find the answers to this question. For so long I’ve done what I had to do, I’ve kind of lost sight of what brings me joy and fulfillment. Now would be a good time to dive deep and uncover those treasures.

The 6 of Wands reversed guides this transformation by helping me triumph over my self doubt and inner demons. It also shows that I need to reframe my achievement so they’re less about defeating things and more about exploring new terrain and overcoming my own fears.

The Empress reversed reinforces the six of Wands reversed by pointing out that my focus needs to be on tending my own inner landscape, nurturing myself and my creative spirit. For so long I’ve been forced to nurture and care for others and it’s left a bad taste in my mouth. I need to relearn that nurturing and nourishing is not a bad thing, not when it’s done willingly. I spent enough time expressing my Empress energy on others, now it’s time to focus that on caring for and nurturing myself.

Unfocused, apathetic and filled with ennui. What the hell is wrong with me? (#Tarot #TarotReading #MuseTarot)

For the past few months I have been at loose ends. I can’t focus; haven’t been able to even start a new book; don’t even feel like changing out of my pajamas. As a result, I feel like a sloth. So I decided to gain some insight by using Tarot to explore what’s going on with me.

Using the Muse Tarot, I asked:

  • Why am I so unfocused?  Queen of Materials Rx
  • What can change this?  10 of Inspiration
  • What underlying factors impact this?  3 of Voices Rx


  • Looking at the cards helped me realize that isolation and quarantine are negatively impacting me (something I’m sure us not unique right now.  I can’t manifest what I want in my life.  I’ve been forced into a caretaker role which is not innate to my nature and feels as though it’s sucking all my creative energies.  I can’t focus on my needs and care for myself because I have to focus on others, and I rail against this restriction.

    I can change this by taking baby steps; nurturing and tending to one interest, one creative endeavor even when I feel too worn out.  Using the large amphora carried by the woman, I can carefully refill the smaller jars and slowly refuel.  Instead of focusing on what I can’t do right now, explore what I can.

    The reversed 3 of Voices touches on childhood feelings of feeling abandoned and excluded; as though I’ve been ditched in advance.  Growing up I was always an oddball, a misfit and didn’t fit in well with most of my peer group.  I had friends but even they didn’t get me.  Quite often I felt like everyone else spoke in a code I didn’t understand and regularly mocked me (yes, I had issues).  Being isolated and disconnected from friends and family right now triggers a lot of those feelings and made me realize it’s something I might need to work on a bit more.

    I know I’m not alone in these feelings.  In fact, in an odd way it’s reassuring to see other crafters expressing similar feelings or chatting with friends and hearing they’re going through their own moments of isolation and frustration.  It helps me understand that I’m not in this alone, even if it feels that way right now.  The best way for me to handle it is focusing on what I can do and using my creative energies in ways that revive and rejuvenate me.

    How can America heal it’s spirit? 4 of Wands Rx, The Hermit Rx & 7 of Pentacles (#MoonGarden #Tarot #TarotReading)

    I’m reading Inner Work: Using Dreams and Active Imagination for Personal Growth by Robert Johnson and he discusses what can happen when we loose our connection to spirit. He wrote “If we don’t go to the spirit, the spirit comes to us as neurosis.” This made me wonder if that explains some of the craziness going on in America – we’ve become disconnected from our spirit.

    In this scenario, I don’t believe spirit equates to religion ( because, quite frankly, I believe most organized religions are just as disconnected from spirit). Instead, I believe it refers to that part of our nature that connects in a caring, symbiotic way with the world around us. It’s that instinct we feel to provide aid and succor when we see people struggling or in need. It’s that inner voice that encourages us to do good; to make the world a better place. That generous, caring side more concerned with ensuring others are treated fairly than with profits and economic theory.

    I have to wonder if capitalism and the push towards a global economy has undermined these traits and reinforced our greedy, gluttonous nature. We seem more focused on want and fear of scarcity without understanding that much of this is artificially created, like planned obsolescence. We focus more on squandering our money on ridiculous frivolities like dog weddings rather than putting our resources to use helping those less fortunate. We convince ourselves that impoverished people are in that situation because they didn’t try hard enough rather than understanding that the deck was stacked against them from the start.

    We accept the theory that “job creators” will trickle down prosperity on the masses as long as the government doesn’t try to restrict them but ignore the reality that once they’ve been given an inch these corporations take the mile. We accept the claims that many things are manufactured in China because it’s more cost effective but ignore China’s history of human & civil right violations and the oppressive nature of it’s policies. We ignore that US corporations that set up shop overseas often create sweatshops so we can buy more affordable gadgets. How do these behaviors reflect a country that claims to represent democracy, freedom and equality?

    So, I decided to ask my guides his we can heal this disconnect from America’s spirit. I drew

    My take (and naturally your mileage may vary) is that we’ve divorced ourselves from our spirit. The reversed 4 of Wands shows our success was based on a belief in ourselves married with the desire to work hard towards that goal. There have always been flaws inherent in the system but I like to think we did strive to be and do better. In the last 40+ years we’ve grown cynical and jaded, taking a more selfish approach. We’ve gone from believing in supporting our communities and helping out neighbors to suspicious isolationists who believe everyone is out for themselves and we should get ours first. It’s all about the money, finding the cheapest price and getting “mine”. I think we lost sight of the true path and let ourselves get seduced by all the shiny things. We view everything as disposable and frugality is a joke.

    The Hermit reversed suggests two things to me. The first is that because we’ve lost our way we’re no longer a light for others; no longer a shining beacon of democracy leading through example. It also reminds us that we cannot and do not exist in isolation. Despite America’s belief in “rugged individualism”, the truth is that it’s almost impossible for industrialized nations to do this on an international level. And, despite my earlier rants about globalization, I don’t think it’s healthy. Perhaps instead of preying on third world nations we should work towards truly improving their social and economic status.

    The 7 of Pentacles offers a possible solution. Perhaps we can use the current situation in the US to take some time and ponder what we’re sowing right now and consider if it’s what we want to continue sowing. Do we wish to truly be a leader in freedom and democracy or become part of the crowd? Are we sowing good will or ill? Are we truly improving the lives of workers in third world nations of are we helping to line the pockets of the ruling class, corporate CEOs, and politicians?

    I realize this oversimplifies many of the issues and factors involved in this situation. I don’t think it’s a magic bullet. What I hope is that anyone reading this will consider how they can make changes in their own lives to reconnect with their spirit. Maybe if enough of us put that energy out in the world it will become a movement that produces permanent change.

    #MessageoftheDay – Queen of Cups, Strength Rx & The Sun (#MoonGarden #Tarot)

    So, it’s been a while. Like many of you I’ve gotten lost in the crazy. Between politics, health concerns and personal losses I can honestly say 2020 has been a year of major suckage so far. So to distract myself I’m rededicating myself to journaling – art, writing and bullet.

    I was inspired by seeing an example of Benjamin Franklin’s daily schedule. It’s elegant and profound in it’s simplicity.

    It excited me and made me want to follow his lead. I love the idea of taking time each day to focus on what good I shall do and what good have I done this day. Such a simple question and yet I already feel challenged answering it.

    Ironically, many years ago I used a Franklin Covey planner and even attended a workshop designed to aid my in getting the fullest benefit from this system. I found it too boring and time intensive to suit my needs and style. It’s a shame such a simple, effective system became bloated and bogged down (well, at least I thought so).

    So, anyway, to celebrate this new focus I decided to ask the Tarot what will best help me stay on course with this new goal. I drew:

    My first response is to laugh because I’m a Leo sun sign so both Strength and The Sun connect with that part of me. And, as those who have followed me for a while might remember, I’m really not a big fan of the suit of Cups (I’m working on it, I’m working on it!). Considering these three as a whole I think the key for me will be following my heart and nurturing my emotional side. That will help me take the inner beast that can be easily distracted and become resistant and unpleasant. Once I’ve embraced and bonded with that inner wildness and feralness, I’ll be able to shine and feel accomplished and victorious.

    Well, that’s my take on it. Now I’ll see if I can achieve this goal.

    #MessageoftheDay 7 of Cups, Ace of Pentacles & Wheel of Fortune (#SecretForest Tarot)

    Well, two days in a row – a new record for me. Once again I decided to simply ask my guides/guardians for insight and guidance. I drew these three cards:

    They suggest that there is a lot hidden beneath the surface that is being circled around but not addressed. There will be new growth and prosperity after this has moved on because that is the nature of things. The cycle will once again begin working its way upwards, however that doesn’t mean the danger is over.

    As I reviewed this reading, I realized this could refer to the changes taking places in families right now.  Social media is filled with posts if parents and children building stronger relationships due to forced social distancing.  We’re mandated to slow down and some are using this opportunity to reconnect with their families; learning to appreciate the often thankless responsibilities teacher handle every day.

    Maybe the growth and changes will be in how we interact with each other moving forward.  Consider all those familial issues we were able to ignore before.  We treaded water rather than diving down to find their origins.  This might be our chance to root out the weeds and allow more healthy, nurtured, nourished relationships to bloom forth.  Of course, we might also learn that in some instances things are unsalvageable.   Although that may prove painful to accept, it will also provide an opportunity to cut away what is rotted and festering and allow a healthier life and relationships in the future.

    Growth and change can be scary but they can also provide opportunities for healing and growth.  Only we can decide how to handle it.

    #ChattingwithTarot – 7 of Cups Rx, The Tower + Queen of Pentacles (#Dreamkeepers #Tarot)

    Today’s ancestral message: “You’re deliberately ignoring the choices that are available to you; pretending they don’t exist. Instead, you’d rather bitch about the things you can’t do. You need to destroy that pointless, limiting mindset; grind it into the dust beneath your feet, so that you can start over again. You need to relearn who you truly are because you’re not the same person you were 10 years ago. Once you’ve asked yourself those questions you may find yourself in a place of fulfillment, confidence and contentment. You’ll also find yourself better able to nurture and sustain others because you’ll finally be able to nurture and sustain yourself.”

    #ComparativeTarot The Star (#DeviantMoon, #Transformational, #GoldenTarot, #RWS)



    The Star is often interpreted as a card of hope, of darkness waning and returning light, of healing and positivity. When we consider how stars can light the darkest sky and bring a sense of wonder and curiosity, we can see those traits reflected in this card.

    It’s interesting that three of the four cards I chose have an image of a female pouring fluid from a pitcher into a body of water. The fourth Star card offers a completely different image of a spider in a web dappled with stars. The images offer a sense of healing waters pouring into the pool; blessed fluid that can offer healing to all those who choose to drink. The spider in the web on the Transformational Tarot Star suggests that we should be tenacious and keep weaving our destiny even when things seem dark because hope is woven into the warp and weft of our lives. Even when it’s web has been destroyed, a spider will often rebuild it creating a beautiful work of art. There is strength and beauty in these images. They remind me of a mother sacrificing it all to continue nourishing and healing her children.

    Despite the positive messages I can see in these Star cards, I can also see the negative. How long should someone pour their heart and soul into caring for others? How many times can we rebuild what has been destroyed by careless, thoughtless actions? When is enough enough? Of course, that is the beauty of Tarot cards, they can comfortable embody both these meanings as well as others and force us to face these issues head-on.

    The rather bizarre image on the Deviant Moon Star card reminds me that even the most oddball, unfamiliar and even frightening creatures have the capacity to nurture and care for loved ones. It shows me that sometimes what is a monster to one person is another’s maternal figure. The spider on the Transformational Star card brings to mind Charlotte, the spider in Charlotte’s Web. She went out of her way to help and protect Wilbur the pig and in the end sacrifices her own life so that her children will thrive. She reminds us that this is the cycle of life and no matter how much we might wish it otherwise, everything needs to, and should, die. Perhaps the very transitory, fragile nature of a spider’s web and life is what makes them so beautiful.

    The RWS and Golden Star cards show a nude woman pouring out healing waters. To me, they speak of needing to strip away all our illusions and delusions, rid ourselves of the trappings of “success”, the distractions with which we surround ourselves in order to avoid facing some truths. If we truly wish to heal, the Star shows us that we need to bare our souls and face the reality of who we are. It reminds me of Inanna’s journey into the underworld. She emerges stronger and with a deeper understanding of things but the process was humiliating and painful. The Star reminds me that this process will be beneficial and healing but no walk in the park.

    Even though they use different imagery and I see different messages in them, these Star cards complement each other and add a layer to the overall meaning of this card. Just as nothing in life is all good or bad, all light or dark, no Tarot card is all positive or all negative. The Star offers a hopeful message of healing and light but getting to that place might lead us to the darkest recesses of our souls.

    #TarotDaily – 6 of Swords + Temperance (#AllHallows)

    What is the state of your creative life? How can you foster it?

    My creative life has gone down the sewer, drifted away like an unwanted toy boat. Okay, maybe that’s a bit over the top. However, looking at the image on this card reminds me of the opening scene of It when little Georgie Denbrough chases his toy ship along the sidewalk. It disappears into the sewer and Pennywise appears, snatching Georgie. Could Georgie have avoided Pennywise if he wasn’t so desperate to reacquire his boat? Could I rediscover my creative life if I was willing to explore new ideas & methods; if I didn’t cling to what I knew before? I’m guessing the answer is “Yes”!

    Temperance again! Obviously forging a new path blending past pleasures and current obligations is the option for me right now. I’ve known this for some time, but the truth is I need to make sure I carve out time for myself. I need to actually use all of the creative tools at my disposal and not just add to the collection. I need to accept that it’s healthy and beneficial to make time for myself if I want to stay sane.