Carolyn Cushing shared this spread in her blog post exploring the energies of this New Moon. I recommend reading her post and considering how you handle and utilize power in your life too. In America right now we’re seeing some of the results of unchecked power and abuses of power. It made me consider how I contribute to, and resist, this paradigm.
POWER: What power desires to flow through me? 8 of Pentacles Rx
RECEIVING: How can I open to receive this power? Page of Cups
RELEASING: How can I let it go? 10 of Pentacles
8 of Pentacles, Page of Cups & 10 of Pentacles – Herbal Tarot
The power desiring to flow through me is the power of putting my skills and knowledge to work; being able to embrace my inner craftsperson. It’s the power of being able to share my experience with others. Right now I’m still acquiring the skills, knowledge, and experience but I have the sense that soon I will have the opportunity to put my skill set to more practical use. Ginger is associated with this card which adds an element of igniting energy, and being more motivated to use my talents and constructive ways. Who knows? Perhaps this suggests that the power desiring to flow through me is that of becoming a teacher in some capacity.
The Page of Cups shows that the way I can be open to receive this power is by literally being more open emotionally; dipping my feet in the water of new experiences and letting go of my need to protect myself. I need to trust in my inner nature and listen to my heart. Damiana can symbolize releasing self-consciousness and feeling more enthusiastic and self-confident. I need to believe in myself and embrace opportunities for growth, even if my initial efforts result in mistakes and stumbling around in ignorance. It’s the only way to truly learn.
The 10 of Pentacles tells me the way to let it go is to first fully embrace it. Then be willing to share it with others. I get the sense it’s telling me that I need to take stock of what skills I have and what knowledge I might be willing to share with others. The addition of Wild Yam to the energies of this card reinforce the message of accumulated energy and power; whose release will encourage the use of talents, gifts, and possessions for the greatest good (according to the companion book).
The message that I’m getting from this reading is that the power flowing through me that wants to be expressed is one of sharing, and teaching, and encouraging others, and myself at the same time. It’s about letting go of the skills and knowledge I hoard as I self-deprecatingly claim I have nothing. I think the first part is that I need to look at what I have that I can and would be willing to share. Then I need to consider how I might go about doing that. It may take some time simply because of the realities of what’s going on in my life, but it does open an intriguing pathway for me.
This week I decided to create a spread based on the messages I received during each of my daily devotionals. As I may have mentioned, from Monday through Friday I perform daily devotionals to the Earth mother, the nature spirits, the ancestors, the gods and goddesses, as well as the fair folk, and the outdwellers. In addition to this, I make a daily offering to a specific deity or ancestor. Right now I honor my hubby, The Morrigan, The Dagda, Thor and Skadi. After making my offering I ask for a message from the ones I honored. From my hubby, The Morrigan and The Dagda, I pull a Tarot card for their response. I use runes for Thor’s and Skadi’s messages. This past week my messages were The Sun Rx, Woman of Battle (Page of Swords), Foundation of Skill (6 of Wands), Ehwaz and Othala. From these messages, I created the following spread.
Who am I in my true self? 6 of Swords
What changes are constellating around me right now? 7 of Swords Rx
What is my true skill in life? Knight of Swords Rx
How can I create a support team to help me in this endeavor? 7 of Wands
How can my ancestors aid me in this endeavor? 3 of Cups
6 of Swords, 7 of Swords Rx, Knight of Swords Rx, 7 of Wands, 3 of Cups from The Wheel of Change Tarot
The message I get from the 6 of Swords is that there is a cycle to life. The caribou dies to feed the tribe. The birds fly south for the winter. Ice and snow cover the land and eventually melt away. In my true self I am a person who understands that there are cycles to life and tries to prepare and plan accordingly. I am willing to make the necessary sacrifices in order to achieve my goals. I’m not willing to continue spinning my wheels with no end in sight, and nothing achieved.
The changes constellating around me right now seem to involve communication and being open to suggestions and ideas from others. The image on this card represents the Rosetta Stone, a tool which allowed us to understand certain ancient languages for the first time. I think this card’s message reveals that I need to look within myself and find my inner Rosetta Stone; I need to find the key that will allow me to interpret my inner thoughts and ideas, and communicate them, calmly, clearly and intelligently, to those that need to hear them.
The Knight of Swords Rx representing my true skill in life threw me. I actually referred to the book on this one, and I rarely do that. Looking at what the deck creator intended this card to symbolize helped me understand that my skill is in approaching things from a very rational, intellectual perspective but not getting caught up in the perspective and vision of pure science. I can’t help but explore what the practical applications might be resulting from pure research. I can’t help but disagree with the belief that potential applications of knowledge shouldn’t preclude the pursuit of that knowledge. Nothing exists in a vacuum. I think we must take a hard look at where our pursuit of knowledge, without having the wisdom to apply it, has led us.
I think the 7 of Wands is telling me that I need to build a support network of friends and loved ones who not only support me but help me recognize my accomplishments and achievements. It has been pointed out to me that sometimes I don’t recognize how extraordinary some of the things I have been able to accomplish actually are. I have an unfortunate habit of downplaying my successes or treating them as though anyone could achieve them. With rare exception shooting my own horn is difficult for me. I need to build a support network that doesn’t allow me to get away with this and challenges me when I do.
The 3 of Cups shows that my ancestors will help me achieve this goal by the ancestral memories and examples they provide. The image on this 3 of Cups reminds me of the pensieve in the Harry Potter series. A tool through which I can revisit past events, and have a better understanding of the sacrifices made and challenges faced by my ancestors. Obviously I do not have a pensieve, but that certainly would be a task for which Tarot is uniquely suited. So I think the way the ancestors can continue to help me is by offering insight and advice from their perspective using the Tarot as a tool for communication.
I think one of my skills is calling myself on my own bullshit. I might be smart enough to use logic and claim that I’m being rational in my behaviors and my decisions however also well aware that I try to fool myself quite a bit. I think my true skill isn’t digging deeper until I get to the root of my bullshit, and expose it so that the light can burn it to a cinder. I’m learning how to listen to myself so that I can explore and understand better who I truly am, and not just meet the needs and expectations of others.
I created this spread to honor the impending arrival of Spring. It’s based on one of my favorite Beatles’ songs, written by George Harrison.
What’s been frozen this winter? Princess of Disks
What will the melting ice reveal? Prince of Disks Rx
What will return the smile to my face? Knight of Disks Rx
What will be made clear? 9 of Cups
Princess of Disks, Prince of Disks Rx, Knight of Disks Rx, 9 of Cups from The Wheel of Change Tarot
What has been frozen this Winter is my ability to explore and learn new things about myself and my environment; my ability to plant seeds that will bring forth new growth and abundance. Some of this might be due to the nature of the season. Some days it’s simply too cold to go outside and roam around. However, I think the bigger portion of this is due to the reality of how limited my life is right now because of the situation with my brother-in-law. I’m realizing it takes a very special focus and mindset to mentally and psychologically free oneself from a physical limitation.
I think the melting ice will reveal that I do have that ability. I just have to believe that I have it. I think the reversed nature of this Prince of Disks shows that I have the skills and capability to build whatever reality I want as long, as I have the willingness to make the attempt. I have to have faith in myself, and confidence in my skill set, because if I don’t believe in myself, the foundation will be too shaky to stand. I also like the inclusion of the wheel in this card which suggests that this reversal will be turned around soon enough. Right now, this is an area that I need to focus on within myself, and within these restrictions but eventually that will change.
When I saw the Knight of Disks show up in response to “What will return the smile to my face?”, I had to smile. The Knight is equivalent to the King in this deck, and I have always seen my husband’s energy as very King of Disks. So in its most simplistic form, this answer is telling me that thinking about my husband will return the smile to my face. In the larger sense I think what it’s showing is that I will always carry him in my heart. I will always feel him watching over me and know that he would support me and want me to be happy and fulfilled. Realizing that is comforting and reassuring and absolutely makes me smile. On another level, this Knight of Disks shows me that I have the potential to become my own Knight of Disks; to become the master of my own physical self and physical space. Once I am able to activate the energies in the Prince of Disks, I will find myself able to manifest my own inner hubby, if you will. I will be able to activate the inner strength I already possess that I have always associated with my husband.
What will be made clear is my inner wishes and desires. I have spent so much time suppressing them because it’s just too painful. When there are limits on how one can pursue one’s interests, it’s much easier to shrink them down to achievable bites. Instead of crying for the moon, and yearning for what I cannot possibly have right now, I have diminished my dreams. I think this reading reminds me that once I am able to have more control over my life, to physically manifest the environment and reality that I desire, I will find it easier to unlock those dreams and begin to actively pursue them.
Despite the fact that The Sun never actually appeared in this reading, it feels like these cards are showing me how I can manifest a reality in which I finally have my moment to shine in the sun again. I will reach a place where I can start to pursue my dreams, hopes, and wishes. First I have to build a solid foundation; manifest my skills and energies in a way that will allow that to happen.
I was chatting with a friend the other day about how people’s pursuit of money can often skew their values and indeed has had a seemingly negative impact upon our society as a whole. That led me to some naval gazing, and I started wondering is it really pursuit of money that’s the root of evil or is it what we think having money grants us? As a society many Americans ascribe certain qualities to being wealthy. We think it makes people happier; makes people impervious to the viscitudes of everyday life. We see it in the news all the time rich, people are not held to the same standards as the rest of us. It’s often claimed that the criminal justice system is very different for people with money, especially white people with money. This made me wonder if it’s really the money that we want or the privilege that we believe accompanies having money. For example, consider Sigmund Freud’s penis envy Theory. I honestly don’t know many women who envy men’s physical possession of a penis. However, it’s possible what women actually envy is the privilege and rights ascribed to them because of said appendage. I think that what we really want is something that makes us feel Superior to other people. Think about people who feel like they’re in the know about a subject people who buy into conspiracy theories because they think it’s hidden information that only a select few can access.
Think about people who feel like they’re in the know about a subject; people who buy into conspiracy theories because they think it’s hidden information that only a select few can access. We all like to feel that we possess secret information to which others are ignorant. Why? Because it allows us to feel Superior in some way. Why do some people fight so hard to take away the rights of minorities or other special groups? Because it’s a way to feel Superior to those people. I could be totally wrong about this because honestly I’m just basing this on a gut feeling but I still thought it might be interesting to explore.
So, I wondered where in my life I suffer from a superiority complex. I know that I have them. Some I’m well aware of, but I’m trying to explore the ones to which I might be oblivious. So I decided to do what I often do in these types of situations. I sought advice from the Tarot.
I asked: 1) What superiority complex do I not see? 2) What will help me recognize it? 3) How has this blind spot been serving me?
Queen of Water, 9 of Air & Wheel of Fortune – Förhäxa Tarot
The Queen of Water reminds me that I tend to be dismissive of people’s feelings or avoid dealing with them. I like to flatter myself that I’m above all of that, but the reality is I’m not. In fact, it’s a weak point for me it’s why I prefer dealing with Swords issues than Cups issues. In my world growing up showing your emotions left you vulnerable and could create a weapon for people to use against you. So I donned a cloak of emotional and vulnerability and used it to protect myself. I draped myself in the moral superiority I felt because I wouldn’t let someone hurt me like that. I have failed to recognize that pretending to be emotionally invulnerable doesn’t mean that I am. In fact by avoiding addressing emotional issues I’ve probably made myself more vulnerable than I would have been had I dealt with this at an earlier point in my life. This Queen of Water is reminding me that instead of learning to embrace my emotions, I’ve barely been able to keep my head above water.
I really love this 9 of Air card. When I first saw, it I thought those were dragonflies coming up out of a swampy body of water (they’re actually hornets). The message I got from this card is what will help me is accepting and acknowledging that no matter how much I ignore emotional issues, they’re lying in wait under the surface. If I don’t handle them they will rise up, and sting me. At the same time, I see these dragonfly/hornets as a hopeful sign because their wings are so luminous against the darkness of the background. It’s a reminder that while intellect cannot control emotions, learning new ideas and taking a new perspective to the matter, will help me develop a plan to deal with them. My emotions are going to be there whether I choose to address them or not. What needs to change, so that I can deal with them in a healthier way, is my mindset about the whole issue.
The Wheel of Fortune shows this blind spot has been serving me because it allowed me to treat my emotions as though they’re something separate from me; my shadow side that I could ignore. They allowed me to try to resist the changes that are essential to grow and expand in life. It was a way for me to try to stave off the inevitable. It allowed me to cling to my illusion that I was somehow Superior because I was not subject to the whims of being overly emotional. In reality what I’ve realized is I didn’t need to be emotional with anyone else because I had my husband. He was my support. He was my rock, my stability. He allowed me to hide my vulnerable, emotional side from anybody but him. I could trust him and knew he wouldn’t hurt me. So in a way, this created a situation where I could allow myself to stagnate in this area. I didn’t need to change and grow because my husband protected me; shielded me.
I found this reading especially interesting because all three of these cards showed up for me earlier in the week as messages from my ancestors. Except they were originally reversed. So once again I’m getting reinforcement of the original message. I need to work on my emotional maturity and nature because if I don’t it’s going to cause me problems in the long run. And that is nothing to feel Superior about.
I have developed a daily devotional practice honoring the Earth mother, the nature spirits, the ancestors, the gods and goddesses that my people honored as well as specific individual deities with whom I feel a stronger connection. I try to keep it fairly simple; offering nuts to the Earth mother, critter food to the nature spirits and tea to the ancestors and the gods. I also used tea for the offering when I’m honoring a specific deity or ancestor, except my husband – he gets coffee. So far this seems to work out very well. After making an offering to a specific ancestor or deity, I take an omen ADF style. When the ancestor or deity is Irish, I use my Celtic Wisdom Tarot for the omen. For my Norse deities I pull a rune. Usually this works fine but every so often things get confusing.
One of the deities that I am trying to build a stronger relationship with is The Morrigan. I have felt drawn to her for many years, but haven’t actually taken any steps to enhance that bond. So recently when I made my first offering to her as part of my daily devotional practice, I received The Shaper (Empress) reversed as my omen/message. As soon as I saw this card I heard a voice in my head telling me “I am not your mother and this is not going to be a kinder, gentler relationship”. Honestly this felt completely appropriate and typical of the kind of energy that I have often felt while working with The Morrigan. She’s not soft and cuddly, and if that’s what I’m looking for she would not be the best goddess with whom to align myself.
The next time I made an offering the card I drew was the Augury of Skill (Ace of Wands) reversed. The image on the card represents the Irish deity Lugh and his spear, which is considered one of the treasures of the Tuatha de Danann. One of the aspects described to Lugh is that he is “many skilled”. So I can see him being associated with the suit of Wands because he is a source of creativity. However having this show up reversed is the message I received confused me a little bit.
The next day the deity that I honored is The Dagda, the Good Father of the Tuatha de Danann, a god of great knowledge, a skilled warrior, and an inspired musician. He possesses a cauldron from which none walk away hungry. He also happens to be considered by many to be the husband of The Morrigan. On a personal note, my husband always struck me as a wonderful embodiment of The Dagda’s energy manifested on this plane. When I pulled a card to receive my message from him, I received the Queen of Battle, The Morrigan. In my head I heard a voice telling me “you need to make sure you understand who she is and what she will be requiring of you”. In other words I had to make sure I had made “right” my relationship with The Morrigan.
So to help me figure out the best way to do this I pulled three more cards for clarification. I asked The Morrigan what was the best way to establish a “right” relationship with her? I drew Woman of Battle Rx, Quest of Art, and Woman of Art (Page of Air Rx, 10 of Water & Page of Water). When I looked at these cards I got distracted by the figures from Irish mythology and folklore that they represented. The Woman of Battle is Queen Maeve. The 10 of Art shows the Salmon of Wisdom being found in The Well of Segais. The Woman of Art represented by Boann, the goddess of the Boyne River whose mythology is also associated with The Well of Segais. My initial response to reading these cards is that The Morrigan was showing me that our relationship will be a battle but not one of the mind. She doesn’t really need to work on my intelligence or mental abilities, because I am fairly comfortable and confident in these areas. However the presence of the 10 and Page of Water suggest that where we will battle is the realm of emotions, the heart. I decided to pull the matching cards from the Förhäxa Tarot to help clarify things for me. It also intrigued me that the two Water cards are connected with a well known as a source of great wisdom. In other words, if I want to actually acquire wisdom, not just knowledge, I need to dive into The Well of my own emotions.
Celtic Wisdom Tarot Förhäxa Tarot
Looking at these cards I had to laugh. The wasp-like shape of the Queen of Air reinforces the idea that I’m going to get stung with some things, will be hurt, but ultimately will be helped. The only way for me to move forward is to let go of the past. The Page of Air Rx suggests that in the past focusing more on my intelligence, logic, and knowledge was a way of protecting myself. If I became like Mr Spock, I wouldn’t have to worry about being hurt by the slings and barbs of others. In some ways, I see myself as Sheldon from Big Bang Theory. I may be insensitive and seem heartless, but most times it’s because I just don’t understand what it is people want or expect from me. I know I should offer distressed people a hot refreshing beverage but don’t always understand why. The roots of that developed as an effort to protect my very soft inner center from the pain of friends who betrayed me or classmates who mocked me. I understand that in many cases they were as clueless as I was, but those barbs dug deep and still reside in my soul. As a result, I put on very thick armor to pretend none of it impacted me, didn’t bother me. In reality I was curled up and crying on the inside.
Similar messages have appeared for me numerous times over the past few months. It has become clear that one of the lessons I need to learn moving forward is to grow more comfortable with that side of my nature; to explore my inner emotions. This is rarely something I will do voluntarily. So it makes perfect sense that the only lens through which I would be willing to explore this side of my nature is the one provided by The Morrigan. She’s not going to cuddle me and Pat me on the back saying “there, there”. Instead she is basically going to slap me at the back of the head and say “put on your big girl panties, and keep going. All of this is in the past. It can’t hurt you anymore unless you let it”. The truth is I know that, but very much like exercising or eating right, that’s often the harder choice to make, so I avoid it. The Morrigan is showing me she’s not going to let me avoid this anymore. I’m both a little terrified and excited. This will really be uncharted territory for me.
In honor of the full moon in Leo, I decided to do a reading for myself focusing on some of the energies associated with this cycle. Since I have been thinking about expressing my creativity in different areas, I thought that might be a fun topic to explore. So using my absolutely stunning Förhäxa Tarot,I asked the following questions.
9 of Earth, Queen of Water Rx, 6 of Air – Förhäxa Tarot
What will inspire me? 9 of Earth – I can be inspired by the natural world around me. Despite the fact that I have limited ability to go beyond the borders of my own property that doesn’t mean I can’t explore the beauty on this property. Practically every day I’m visited by squirrels, various birds, ducks, occasionally a swan comes by, and my heron sometimes drops in. They all offer an amazing window into the natural world that surrounds this little piece of land and I need to take advantage of it. Nature journaling might be the perfect way to get me started and inspire me to try new techniques or revisit old techniques.
What will challenge me? Queen of Water Rx – I think the Queen of Water is showing me that what will challenge me is what always challenges me, exploring and embracing my inner emotions. Cup issues are a realm I prefer to avoid. The truth is, I think the only thing holding me together right now is the fact that I don’t give in to becoming overly emotional. However, I’m realizing that ignoring or avoiding this part of my psyche also limits me because it’s difficult to find ways to sustain yourself emotionally if you avoid diving into that pool. The truth is ignoring or avoiding my emotions doesn’t mean they don’t exist and are impacting the situation. I can see this becoming a challenge when it comes to expressing my creativity because I do believe that one’s creativity is innately tied to one’s emotional state. So this ought to be fun.
What practical steps can I take? 6 of Air – I think this reinforces the idea that although I cannot physically change my environment right now, I can change my mindset. This message has come up for me several times in the past few months. The only limits on me are ones I impose upon myself. Even if I’m limited in where I can go and what I can do in the physical realm, that doesn’t stop me from using my mind to learn new things; explore new ideas. I need to keep the fact uppermost in my mind.
So, clearly the cards are telling me that my creativity is only limited by my own internal restrictions. I don’t need to leave this property in order to be creative, I only think I do. I’ve recently become enamored with the idea of plein air painting, painting outdoors. Nothing says that needs to be any further than 5′ outside the front door. Implicit in these cards is a message of “just do it”. It has come up for me numerous times as a reminder that much of what limits me is my own internally imposed restrictions. I have to move beyond that to avoid stifling my creativity.
10 of Pentacles, 5 of Swords & 6 of Wands Rx from The Haunted House Tarot by Sasha Graham
I felt rather overwhelmed and befuddled this past week. I’m still trying to get things resolved with regard to a housing situation for my brother-in-law or, rather, I’m waiting for the Department of Social Services to do so. I realized they are a bureaucracy, and as such move at a glacial pace, however I have reached the end of my rope and can no longer sustain the current situation. I am in the process of selling my mother-in-law’s house and once that is accomplished my brother-in-law needs to be gone. I’m trying not to be harsh about the situation but I’ve been doing this for a year and a half with absolutely no relief and have reached the end of my internal resources. It came to a head earlier this week when my brother-in-law’s caseworker asked me to postpone the sale. To say you could have knocked me over with a feather would have been an understatement. This has resulted in a bit of spiraling on my part so I decided I needed to get some clarity.
I decided to try this Major Influences Spread by Nancy Antenucci that I found in 101 Tarot Spreads by 20 Modern Tarot Masters (Volume 1). I like three card spreads because they’re simple enough to not be overwhelming and one can always pull additional cards for further clarification. As you can see in the image above I drew the 10 of Pentacles, 5 of Swords and 6 of Wands reversed from The Haunted House Tarot by Sasha Graham. I do so love when the Tarot gives me such a clear message.
So, in answer to what are the apparent known influences in this situation I drew the 10 of Pentacles. The image in this card so perfectly fits my current situation that it’s unnerving. One of my primary goals or motivations in this entire thing is getting moved back into my house before winter starts. I had originally hoped to be there by Halloween but that is clearly not happening. I’m tentatively hopeful that I will be there by Thanksgiving, but I think it might be more realistic to hope that I can celebrate Thanksgiving in the house, even if I’m not fully moved in yet. So this image of a snow covered house with a happy family card in the foreground exactly expresses my motivations, desires and goals.
This 5 of Swords card is a bit unnerving because the figure in the foreground holding the knife looks like a man dressed in an old-fashioned nurse outfit. He seems to be holding the knife and staring at the heroine of the piece, but it’s difficult to tell his intent. I think this is to remind me that, while I am frustrated with DSS’s seeming lack of action up to this point, I’m not really sure what’s going on behind the scenes. All might not be as it appears to me. I’m sure there is a lot of behind the scenes negotiating and planning, to which I’m not privy, attempting to resolve this situation. And, as a dear friend reminded me during this week, this is nothing personal against me. As far as DSS is concerned, I’m actually rather irrelevant to this process. I’m the caregiver that provides direct services, but how it impacts me is really not their priority. I don’t have to like it but I also should be careful not to take it as a personal attack because then my responses create negative situations that don’t need to occur.
The 6 of Wands reversed reminds me that this isn’t a personal battle or a personal attack. As I mentioned in the previous card, this is more about bureaucracies that are underfunded and understaffed trying to do the best with the resources available to them and make sure it is in the best interest of their clients. I’m not their client so I’m just not their priority. If my need and interests intersect with theirs that’s great. If not, they’re not as cooperative. It isn’t an attack on me. If I can take the sense of personal attack out of it, I might be able to handle things in a calmer and more rational manner. At the same time, I think this card is reminding me not to abandon my needs either. I don’t have to go gently into that good night, and it’s important that I advocate for myself and my needs. I also need to be cautious about acting like Bam Bam Rubble, smashing anything in my way to emerge victorious. Remembering that these representatives of government agencies are not trying to prevent me from achieving my goals and desires, they’re merely trying to ensure my brother in law’s needs are being met as well. No one actually triumphs in this situation; it’s more a case of the best possible outcome.
Overall this reading help me clarify some of the issues that have been bedeviling me this past week. Ultimately I will get moved into my home and this house will be sold. My brother-in-law will be placed in a safe facility that can meet his needs. Both our lives will go forward. I need to be cautious not to let incorrect interpretations and misunderstandings create a hostile and negative relationship with these government agencies because that will not help this process. At the same time it’s perfectly fair for me to say that my needs matter too and I am not a doormat. I have every right to say enough is enough, and they need to do whatever is necessary to ensure that my brother-in-law is placed somewhere once this house is sold. That’s not me being selfish, that’s me looking out for my own health and well-being and survival.
This spread is from Sasha Graham’s 365 Tarot Spreads. The Mystery School Spread’s cards are cast in a circle, symbol of wholeness, unity, and infinity:
1. How can I transform my consciousness? The Wheel of Fortune
2. What specific action can I take to awaken energy in my body? 9 of Pentacles Rx
3. What dormant ability lies within me? Knight of Swords Rx
4. What experience do I need to have? 4 of Pentacles
5. What knowledge waits for me? 4 of Swords Rx
6. How does my experience of life change as a result? 6 of Pentacles Rx
The Wheel of Fortune points out that change is the only way to transform my consciousness. Fighting against the cycles of changes futile and yet it is something in which I have engaged the majority of my life. I dig in my heels shake my head and stubbornly insist, “No, no, no!” At the same time, when I have accepted and embraced the change I have learned things about myself, knowledge I would never have acquired without experiencing the changes.
The 9 of Pentacles Rx is showing that the specific action I need to take to awaken my body is to actually pay attention to my body. Instead of being distracted by stuff and things I need to look within myself and listen to what my body is telling me it needs. Whether that is healthier food, more exercise, or more downtime and relaxation, if I don’t take proper care of my physical being how can I expect to have any energy at all.
The Knight of Swords Rx reminds me that my dormant ability is an ability to strategize and plan. Right now, I’ve lost sight of that because I’ve made a few decisions based on stress that ultimately bit me on the behind. That leaves me feeling off balance and foolish. I also realize that there is a limit to my energy level. Trying to do too much at one time depletes it much quicker, leaving me exhausted and burnt out. Recognizing this and delegating these tasks to other people that can help me is smart. Despite the fact that I feel like a failure because I can’t do it myself, this reminds me that it is probably the smartest thing I can do and I need to stop beating myself up about it.
The 4 of Pentacles shows me that the experience I need to have is one of conserving my resources. I need to prioritize my own needs the way I would someone else’s. For the last few years other people’s needs of taking precedence above my own and that needs to stop. I need to treat my energy like the precious resource it is;conserve it, value it, and use it wisely.
The 4 of Swords Rx reveals that the knowledge waiting for me is one of inner peace, solitude and learning how to truly be alone. I haven’t truly been alone my entire life, especially not in the last 13 years. I have always either lived with family or with my husband. The next phase is going to be quite a learning one for me because I’m going to have to learn to be completely independent. I’m going to have to learn to ask people for help because there will be no one here to step in and shoulder the burden without my doing so. It’s a rather frightening prospect but an exhilarating one as well.
According to the 6 of Pentacles Rx my experience in life will change how I look at the give and take of things. Sometimes we give to those who prove undeserving or receive aid from those we’ve never helped. Sometimes, it may not seem fair but I need to be true to my values regardless of others behaviors. At the same time I think this is a reminder that being cautious and slightly skeptical is not necessarily a bad thing. I think this ties in with the message of the 4 of Pentacles that I need to learn how to conserve my resources.
Overall this reading has reinforced some things that I already knew but needed reminding. I often find that when my own thoughts are the most chaotic, Tarot will help the universe remind me of my truth and clarify where I need to focus my energies.
I found this spread on Litha Rose’s website and thought it would be a great way to celebrate the Sabbat!
Temperance Rx, 8 of Cups Rx, The Chariot, 4 of Coins & 2 of Cups Rx from Le Psycho Tarot/The New Tarot by Hurley & Horler
1.What is my harvest? (Celebrate this!) Temperance Rx – Temperance Rx shows that my harvest is forging the things I want to do and the things I must do into a balanced and cohesive whole. This is still a work in progress for me but I am very happy with the success I’ve had so far. Temperance is always a challenge for me because it speaks of moderation and being temperate, neither of which are innate to my nature.
2. How can I best spend this autumn season? 8 of Cups Rx – Seeing this card made me hear the song Let It Go. To me, it’s about putting the mourning behind me; about focusing on what I want to bring into my life going forward, not what I have to leave behind. That doesn’t mean I won’t always miss my husband, simply that I won’t lose myself in the grief.
3. How can I best close off this year? The Chariot – I can best close off this year by taking the reins of my own life. It’s been a challenge since my husband passed away, taking over the responsibility for things that I always let him handle. It’s made me passive in certain aspects of my own life. I think the Chariot is showing that it’s time to pick those reins up again and start becoming more focused about where I want to steer my course.
4. How can I find more balance in my life? 4 of Coins – Unlike the usual imagery for this card, this 4 of Coins seems more about conserving one’s physical essence and tending to ones health. Or maybe that’s what I’m seeing because that is what would be extremely appropriate for me right now. I’ve been so focused on taking care of others for the past few years that I have lost sight of my own health. This card points out that I need to be more balanced in this respect and start to put my own physical concerns and health needs on a par with those of others.
5. What can I find if I descend in the dark and look inward? 2 of Cups Rx – I will find true emotional balance. I will find a way to merge and blend the light and dark halves of my spirit and heart. If there is one thing I’ve learned since my husband died, it’s that a relationship with someone else requires compromise, which forces us to downplay or give up pieces of who we are. Whether we want to acknowledge it or not, in a truly beneficial, loving relationship, both parties change certain aspects of their personality in order to maintain a healthy relationship. Perhaps we drop interest in certain things because our partner doesn’t enjoy them. Or we don’t want to force participation in an activity they won’t enjoy. One of the most interesting aspects I’m finding about widowhood is that I don’t have to compromise with anyone anymore. I can do what I want, when I want. That is both amazingly freeing and absolutely terrifying! And I think it pertains to this card because what it’s showing is that right now is that descending into darkness will help me strengthen and further explore my relationship with myself.
Cards from The New Tarot/Le Psycho Tarot by Hurley & Horler
My friend Diane sent me a link to this reading from the Llewellyn website. I thought it looked interesting and decided to use it as my spread for this week. I find the message the cards have given me to be fascinating (of course I would, it’s about my life 😉)
Pile One: Top Card: The Hanged Man Question: What do I currently need to let go of and release in my life? 8 of Cups Bottom Card: An additional message from The Hanged Man. 7 of Swords Rx
Pile Two: Top Card: The Chariot Question: Where should I put my focus for moving forward? 3 of Cups Bottom Card: An additional message from The Chariot. 9 of Cups
Pile Three: Top Card: Ancestors Question: Advice from the Ancestors. Ace of Cups Bottom Card: More advice from the ancestors. King of Coins/Earth.
The 8 of Cups is showing me that what I need to release is my emotional connection to things which meant something in my past but no longer resonate for me. One of the first things that comes to mind is my doll collection. I have a rather large collection of Barbie and other fashion dolls and they haven’t sparked Joy in quite some time. It’s time for me to let them go so I can make room in my life for something new. I also think this refers releasing any lingering guilt about the situation with my brother-in-law. Intellectually, I understand that what I’m doing is not only the right thing, it’s the best thing. However that doesn’t mean I’m not occasionally hit with twinges of regret and frustration that I have to make this decision; that I was left to clean up this mess. The addition of the seven of Swords reversed suggests to me that the guilt I’m taking on isn’t mine to bear. What I need to release is feeling responsible for other people’s burdens. It’s time to start reclaiming my own life, and the only way I can do this is to stop carrying guilt, sorrow, and emotional entanglements that hamper me from moving forward.
The 3 of Cups shows me that my focus should be on finding what sparks joy in my life; finding new friends and social connections that help me enjoy and celebrate what awaits me down this road. Instead of saying no to things, I need to start saying yes and open myself up to the fun and happiness that can bring. This seems to be even more reinforced by the 9 of Cups, which certainly suggests feeling emotionally fulfilled and having your wishes come true. It’s time for me to take control and steer my path along the road that will bring fun, joy, happiness, and emotional fulfillment.
My ancestors seem to be reinforcing the message abov by giving me the Ace of Cups. Once again, I get a sense of reconnecting with my heart; rediscovering things that bring me joy and a sense of contentment and happiness. It is enhanced by the King of Coins, which tells me that once I find my emotional core and reconnect with my inner dreams, live a more heart centered life, I will finally realize my own worth and feel better able to deal with the practical day-to-day realities. I will become the ruler of my life; become more grounded, practical, and learn to appreciate and care for my body as well as my heart, mind and soul.
This reading has been illuminating in many ways; reinforcing some things I already knew. It’s helped me fine tune where I need to channel my energies as well as come closer to accepting other things which I’ve known for some time but resisted.
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