So, my ancestors were unexpectedly charitable today. Instead of the usual smack upside the head (in a loving, concerned manner of course), I got a bit of an “attagirl”. They’re reminding me that I’ve learned a lot over the years. In fact, I’ve learned enough that I could teach certain things if I chose to do so. I just need to maintain confidence in myself; keep my expertise, enthusiasm, and ability to engage others in the forefront. I also need to make sure I enjoy what I’m doing. At the end of the day what I know and how I convey that is only beneficial if I enjoy doing it. Otherwise, it becomes just one more chore over the course of my life.
Today while sharing a cuppa tea with my #ancestors. I asked for some advice & guidance. This was their reply:
I heard “You’re wasting time, hoping for the perfect opportunity. Stop futzing around and move forward. Trust that the direction in which you’re moving is the way you’re meant to go. You’ve done a lot of hard work; sown a lot of seeds; honed your skills. Now it’s time to real the benefits and embrace your achievements.”
Over my afternoon cuppa @HarneyTea’s wondrous Viennese Earl Grey blend, I had my chat with the Divine (today it felt rather like Grandma Burke, my paternal grandmother, decided to pay a call). Her message to me:
What I heard, “Enough already! I get it, you’re feeling frustrated and stifled because life right now requires you to focus on being nurturing and somewhat maternal – not your favorite thing. You think your creative juices are drying up from lack of use. I call bullshit! You aren’t looking at things clearly. Open up you damn eyes and see what’s really going on. See how you can change things so your creative energies find expression. Stop waiting for things to change and make it happen! Stop letting self-pity hold you down. You already know the answer so trust your instincts.”
So, regular card of the day readings aren’t working for me. So I decided to take a slightly different approach and have a daily chat with my Tarot deck.
I got the idea during Rana George’s session on Lenormand at this year’s Divination Day prior to Readers’ Studio. She said she would never do a one card Lenormand reading because a Lenormand reading is like a sentence requiring a subject, verb and object or like a conversation. It needs more than just one card. So I took that concept and applied it to my daily readings for myself. It helps put me in a different frame of mind.
So I sat down with a cuppa tea, pulled three cards and this is the message I received:
Her message:. “Stop resisting change, moving on to the next phase. You’re fighting too hard to maintain the status quo; defending yourself from imaginary threats. The only demons are in your head and if you look at things clearly you’ll realize they don’t exist. Right now the only thing you need to defend yourself from are your own doubts.”
Have you ever heard of the Scottish myth of the Selkie? It’s a tale of a mythical, shapeshifting seal woman who sheds her skin and turns into a beautiful woman. A man becomes enamored of her and steals her skin, hiding it where she cannot find it. As long as he possesses her skin, the seal woman cannot leave. They often live as a married couple, having children and seemingly content. Eventually, the seal woman’s yearning for the sea becomes too much and either the husband, who truly loves her, restores her skin to her so she can return to the sea or she finds it herself and leaves him and their children behind.
I find these stories and the dynamics they express are still present in modern relationships, both interpersonal and communal; as above, so below.
Have you ever observed or found yourself in a relationship in which you feel your spirit is being held, hostage? Perhaps you initially agreed to the dynamics of the relationship but over time they shifted or your needs did and you find yourself unable to break free? I often note this dynamic in relationships where one partner is financially dependant upon another – often whichever is the stay at home parent raising the children or engaging in other traditionally feminine roles. I’m not referring to a SAHM or SAHD who feel this is their life purpose and who are treated as equal partners in the relationship. I’m referring to those in which the stay at home partner is treated unequally and told things like “It’s my money and I’ll decide how it’s spent” (you know what I’m talking about). Or relationships in which the more financially secure and established partner threatens to take away the children or the home if the other partner leaves. Some wonder how a woman can leave her children behind but if she has been forced to bear these children and their father and society determine they are “his”, then perhaps they are really a symbol of her imprisonment. How awful must it be to find yourself forced to bear children for someone who is imprisoning you?
I see this dynamic on a national scale in the US since the attacks on Sept 11th. So many are willing to give up their autonomy, right to privacy and independence for the illusion of safety and security Some have given up their skins in pursuit of the illusion of being cared for by the government and as a result those of us who were not willing to give up our freedom is being forced to anyway. Our skins have been stolen by those in charge. That is such a risky proposition. I think it’s what has to lead us to the situation in which we currently find ourselves and if we don’t fight to reclaim our skins we may find we are never able to return to that place of autonomy and independence and that way lies dictatorship.
So I asked the Divine via the Tarot:
Where am I a Selkie in my own life? 9 of Sword
How is Selkie energy being expressed in people’s lives? Page of Swords
How can we reclaim our skins? Knight of Pentacles
What can the Selkie teach us? 8 of Wands
So, my take on this reading. The first thing I noticed is that there are no Majors present. That suggests that changing this situation is entirely within our control. It’s about using our wits, our minds backed by groundedness and passion. This isn’t a time to appeal to hearts because people’s hearts (in many instances) are filled with fear.
In my own life, I think it’s more a fear of finding myself in a Selkie-type situation rather than a reality. The truth is that I’ll never willingly give up my skin and, in fact, would fight to the death to reclaim it. I’m also not in a relationship with a man who feels the need to dominate me in any way. In fact, he values and supports my independence and snarkiness.
The Page of Swords suggests that Selkie energy is the result of insecurity and an inability to trust in ourselves. We’re not sure we can protect ourselves and are trusting in others to do it for us. It seems logical to trust in the government to put our best interest first but history has proven that is risky and often unrealistic. Especially if the reality is that we’re being terrified into abandoning our skins. We’re not children (well most of us) and need to take responsibility for ourselves and our safety. If we allow anyone else to take away our freedom, we doom ourselves to losing autonomy over our lives. Can we really trust someone who has either captured, imprisoned or brainwashed us to ensure our rights won’t be violated?
The Knight of Pentacles offers the hopeful message that we can reclaim our skins but it will be an uphill battle. We will need to be stubborn, determined and focused. We can’t lose our heads or allow ourselves to be distracted by extraneous matters. Whether this is at a national or personal level, we need to stay the course and be willing to make the sacrifices and take the risks necessary to achieve this goal.
The Selkie teaches us that nothing is stagnant. New ideas and beliefs, new inspiration and energy are constantly entering our lives. Even if certain circumstances fit our needs right now, that may not be the case down the road and we need to be willing to fight for ourselves, for our autonomy and for our ability to breathe free. We need to seize the moment and be willing to burn down the house if all other options are exhausted.
So, today while drawing my two cards I asked where I need to focus my energy; what needs my attention? I drew the Ace of Wands Rx and 2 of Wands Rx. I immediately thought of creative energy being stifled; of incomplete, unfulfilled projects. Then, while browsing through Christine Jette’s Tarot for the Healing Heart I read a passage focusing on clearing blockages and connecting with our divine spark in order to facilitate healing and felt like a lightning bolt struck me. This was my message!
It’s time to clear away all those damned blockages I’ve allowed to build up that prevent me from fully healing. It’s time to embrace that divine spark and re-experience the magic and wonder all around me. So I’m going to start working my way through this book and see where it leads. I have a feeling it will be an enlightening journey!
Today I wondered what lesson I need to learn? Where should I be focusing my energy? I drew:
I need to learn to balance my energy and focus more effectively; blend what I must do with what I want to do. It would also help if I listened to my institution, trusted my inner voice. The truth is I know what to do and how to do it but I need to listen and trust in my inner wisdom; the self-knowledge woven through my soul.