#ChattingwithTarot – 10, Knight + 2 of Pentacles (#WizardsTarot)

While enjoying a cuppa Harney & Sons Malachi McCormick blend, I had a chat with the Morrigan, my divine guide when she’s in the mood,  Her message today was pretty simple but effective, “If you want that happy ending, to reach that goal of prosperity and abundance, then you need to do the hard work.  Keep seeking ways to improve and move forward, and balance what you need to do with what you want to do.”  Perhaps not the most earth-shattering message but still a useful smack upside the head.

#ChattingwithTarot – 6 of Swords Rx, 7 of Wands + 9 of Swords Rx (#WizardsTarot)

So, regular card of the day readings aren’t working for me. So I decided to take a slightly different approach and have a daily chat with my Tarot deck.

I got the idea during Rana George’s session on Lenormand at this year’s Divination Day prior to Readers’ Studio. She said she would never do a one card Lenormand reading because a Lenormand reading is like a sentence requiring a subject, verb and object or like a conversation. It needs more than just one card. So I took that concept and applied it to my daily readings for myself. It helps put me in a different frame of mind.

So I sat down with a cuppa tea, pulled three cards and this is the message I received:

Her message:. “Stop resisting change, moving on to the next phase. You’re fighting too hard to maintain the status quo; defending yourself from imaginary threats. The only demons are in your head and if you look at things clearly you’ll realize they don’t exist. Right now the only thing you need to defend yourself from are your own doubts.”

The Body Never Lies (#TarotfromtheDarkSide)

I’ve been reading Alice Miller’s “The Body Never Lies” I felt it resonate within me. In the book, Miller addresses the damage abusive parenting can cause in our lives. Specifically, she connects diseases in adulthood, ranging from asthma to mental illness, to harsh, cruel parenting styles. Miller uses the histories of well-known writers to support her theories and, while I think she makes some overly enthusiastic leaps of logic, her premise rings true.

One of the points Miller makes that I find intriguing is that we block these abuses from our memories because adherence to the 4th Commandment (honor thy father and mother) is so prevalent in our society that we don’t even realize its impact. We can’t reconcile our need to honor our parents with the realities of the abuses we experience and this manifests in physical and mental ailments. Our souls and psyches are broken on the wheel of obedience to our parents’ wills and societal demands that we honor our abusers.

I know in my own life I was frequently told not to speak ill of my parents; that I didn’t’ understand what they had gone through. Depending upon my age and attitude at the time I might ignore the comments or I might choose to unleash a rage-filled diatribe against the offender, explaining to him or her that they were talking out their ass. In some respects I consider myself blessed because I seem to lack that personality trait that requires me to absolve my parents of their sins against me. I may have learned to forgive my parents but it doesn’t ameliorate the abuses to which they subjected me. However, my goal here is not to revisit these abuses or even to explore Miller’s theories. Instead, I want to use Tarot to explore my own responses to this childhood abuse and how I can heal from it.

So my question is: How have childhood traumas impacted me:
Physically? Dancer of Money & the Material World
Emotionally? Muse of Self
Psychologically? Sage of Money & the Material World Rx
How can I move forward and heal this damage? Muse of Money & the Material World Rx


Looking at these cards the initial message I receive is that as a result of my childhood experiences I have a chip on my shoulders; always struggling not to lose myself beneath the weight of those experiences. I can also be emotionally closed off and protective of my heart. At the same time, I am willing to keep struggling uphill and I’m comfortable exploring those dark places within myself; to explore my shadow side. I’ve also put a lot of time and effort into mastering and exploring my psyche so the damage has been exposed, explored and expunged.

Moving forward, I think the key to dealing with this is to remember that it is in the past, it can’t hurt me anymore. I know how to balance the anger and betrayal I feel towards my parents because of those traumas against the love I genuinely do bear them. I can understand some of what damaged them and lead to this abuse but that doesn’t exonerate them. I think the primary difference between my experience and those Alice Miller writes about is that I never accepted it was okay. I never forgot or tried to downplay those memories. I was also fortunate enough to have a husband who bore witness and reinforced that I had every right to hate my parents for what they did to me. So, although I am certainly damaged by my childhood trauma I have also healed and learned to move forward.

#TarotDaily – 9 of Coins + 8 of Coins (#RetrospectiveTarot)

As I was shuffling my deck I asked where I should focus my energies today. I laughed a bit as I drew the 9 and 8 of Coins. Looking at them I was reminded of a line spoken by Mr. Spock in the classic Star Trek episode Amok Time. Mr. Spock believes he has just killed Captain Kirk in a battle over Spock’s wife T-Pring. When questioning her about her motives for demanding a challenge T-Pring explains that she was tired of being the consort of a legend and wished to be the wife of Stonn, her companion. Spock admires her logic in pursuing her goals and explains to Stonn that he may find that having is not so great a thing as wanting. This line has always stayed with me because it feels like a profound truth; something of which we all seem to lose sight. To be fair, I have always felt that Gene Roddenberry (and Rod Serling for that matter) was a genius and visionary so I shouldn’t be surprised.

As positive as the 9 of Coins is often considered to be, I often find myself thinking about becoming imprisoned by your possessions; becoming like a dragon sitting atop its hoard, unable to move forward. I have found myself falling into this scenario on quite a few occasions. I become so focused and obsessed with acquiring things that I forget to have fun with them. This has resulted in a larger than necessary collection of cookbooks, dolls and Tarot decks (I know, I know – how can one ever have to many Tarot decks?). I have learned that there comes a point when having too many things prevents you from enjoying them because you become overwhelmed.

I also think many humans are hardwired to pursue; to need goals to work towards. My hubby and I often talk about when we were kids saving money up for some toy or electronic device and how much sweeter it was to get once we’d finally saved the money. With credit cards, few people experience that anymore. It’s so easy to instantly gratify our ever whim and desire and then repent when it’s too late.

These two cards remind me to take time to “shop my closet”; to enjoy what I already own and spend less time lusting after new “pretty shinies”. As lovely as each deck might be, do I really need 5 different animal themed decks or 20 RWS variations? I own numerous decks that are lovely to look at but which don’t really speak to me. Maybe now is a good time to release them into the wild. This is my opportunity to begin working with my decks again rather than petting and gloating over them like Gollum with his “Precious”.

Am I the only one who finds herself in this situation? Somehow I doubt it. If it’s one thing I’ve learned in my years in the Tarot community it’s that we’re all collectors, acquirers and hoarders on some level. It doesn’t take much to quickly find yourself in possession of more decks than you ever dreamed possible. Online communities contribute to this by generating buzz for new decks and creating a “must have it now” mentality that often leaves us with more decks than we want, need or can use. Moving forward I plan to resist these urges and begin purging the decks I already possess so that I pare my collection down to more manageable levels. It turns out Mr. Spock was quite correct about the difference between having and wanting.

#TarotDaily – The Fool + 4 of Cups (#TrickorTreat)

How are you thinking about your future? How are you preparing for your future?

The Fool reminds me that my future is unknown and filled with potential; endless possibilities. It’s a chance to explore unfamiliar territory, chart a new course for myself. Nothing has yet been written so believing in myself and having faith that things will work out offers the promise of fulfillment and joy.

I’m preparing for this potential future by remembering that even if I don’t like the choices before me, I do have a choice. We create our future based upon today’s choices and actions. Even if we take no action or decide not to vote or engage with others, we have made a choice. This gives us more control over our lives and forces us to take responsibility for our decisions or lack thereof. That means we do have the power in our lives. The 4 of Cups reinforces this message.

#TarotDaily – The Empress + 10 of Discs (#AllHallows)

How are you exploring your subconscious? Why might it be a good idea to seek a connection with it?

Ironic that I drew The Empress in response to this; for many years I had quite a hostile relationship with her. Perhaps, like a lot of abused children, in an effort to avoid feeling powerless I identified with the abuser. I think I already had a well-developed Yang personality. Add in the perceived weakness of the women in my life and it was almost inevitable that to feel strong I expressed traditionally masculine attitudes and behaviors. Now, in order to explore my subconscious I need to follow a more Yin, feminine path.

This unfamiliar, to me anyway, path can help me become whole; learn to blend my outer Yang and inner Yin. It will help me heal and become more comfortable, more at home in my own skin. The truth is that I will always be assertive, forceful, quick to express my opinions and somewhat obnoxious. Diplomacy and tact are not really in my repertoire. Soothing the feelings of others rarely occurs to me but I suppose it’s never too late to learn. The first step is to embrace the belief that Yin energy is just as powerful and strong as Yang energy. Maybe it’s time to accept that I don’t need to be so defensive. I can let my guard down a bit (just a bit) and let a select, trusted few within the perimeter.

#TarotDaily – King of Pentacles + 8 of Swords Rx (Radiant WS)

TarotHunter’s Salt Rounds:

  • You have all that you desire, all the wealth you ever wanted, but it isn’t providing the satisfaction you believed it would. Instead, you’re trapped by your own mind. You think you have to continue maintaining this lifestyle; to keep up with the Joneses, but is that accurate? Maybe it’s time to put that mindset behind you, remove your blinders and take a reassess your priorities.
  • You’re surrounded by abundance and plenty but feel as though you’ve lost your mind. You’ve lost sight of what you once believed and your view of the world. Now you’re wondering what you can do to change this situation. The reality is, accepting this is the biggest part of the struggle. if you truly wish to free yourself from this current reality all you have to do is try.
  • You feel as though you have so much while others around you are suffering. At the same time you feel as though you are helpless, powerless to change this situation. That is a fallacy. You’re in a uniquely perfect position to make positive changes if you choose to do so. The first step is removing your blinders and seeing yourself for the powerful, influential person you truly are. Stop merely thinking about making changes and start talking to those who can help get your message across.

#TarotDaily – 5 of Coral Rx + Ace of Sparks (#Pholarchos)

She celebrates! The melancholy, sadness and loss are behind her now. She is finally able to express her joy, to embrace her bliss. Her mind is filled with new ideas new energy, new inspiration. They run rampant across her imagination.

The potential awaits activation. The endless possibilities excite and tickle her spirit but she was unable to see it until she released her grief.

#TarotDaily – Ace of Sparks Rx + 2 of Sparks (#Pholarchos)

It is time! Enough energy was spent in the planning stages; now it’s time to move forward, to get this show on the road. The inspiration for this kept you up nights, running through your thoughts like an out of control herd of mustangs. Harness that untamed energy, that wild spirit! Let that creative drive work for you.

#TarotDaily – 10 of Stakes Rx + The Daughter Rx (Sacred Bridges)

TarotHunter’s Salt Rounds:

  • All the nails are falling out of what you’ve built. You hoped your accomplishments would gain you the recognition you desire but instead you feel young, inexperienced and like a failure. Learn from this experience and don’t let it hold you back.
  • This entire process has been internal for you; you finally feel able to move on and can accept that your achievements may never generate public acclaim or recognition. Instead you move towards accepting that idea that internal validation may be the only kind you are likely to get.
  • You’re trying to resist the inevitable, avoid what comes next, but doing so only prolongs the pain and prevents moving forward. Right now you may feel like you have been exposed as incompetent instead of praised for your skill. That sucks but the only way to get to the other side is to keep moving. It’s time to quickly rip off the bandage, doing it slowly drags things out and doesn’t actually reduce the pain.