I’m once again going to borrow a page from James Ricklef’s KnightHawk technique and do a Tarot reading for a fictional character.  I’ve decided Sam Winchester, the younger brother in the TV series Supernatural is reaching out for advice on how to handle his family’s resistance to his leaving for college.

“I’ve had an unusual upbringing.  My father’s job forces us to travel all over the country, never staying in any location for very long.  My older brother enjoys this but I find it chaotic. I want to live a stable, more normal life. In order to achieve this goal, I plan to attend college.  Despite this chaotic childhood, I managed to manage an excellent GPA and have been offered a scholarship to Stanford University but I’m conflicted.

Despite our contentious relationship, I love my father but I don’t want to live the life he has planned for me.  My older brother, Dean, who practically raised me, will be devastated at my leaving but if I stay  I’ll resent him.  I know what I’m going to do – Stanford is my future.  What I’d like advice about is how/if I can make my family understand why I need to do this.  Thank you for your help.” – Sam Winchester

Hi Sam,

Thank you for choosing me to provide you with additional insight and advice regarding this issue.  It must be difficult for you to leave your family behind and pursue your dreams, especially if you are close to them.  I’m going to pull three cards for you to see what clarity we can find.

What underlies their resistance?  Page of Peppermills They’re afraid that you’re still very young and too eager to get out into the big, wide world without being fully aware of the dangers you might face.  You’re full of excitement and enthusiasm, piss and vinegar, for college and can’t wait to explore what “normal” looks like but  despite what lessons you’ve learned and how prepared you believe you are, your family is worried about your safety.  They’re afraid you’re impetuous and too hot-headed for your own good.

How to address their concerns?  10 of Hats Rx

I don’t think there is an easy answer for this one.  The truth is that your family may be loyal and fierce in your defense of each other but any resemblance to a happy family is illusory at best.  You aren’t comfortable dealing with this but I get the sense that you left “happy” in the rearview mirror at some point.  That means discussions about how you feel about college and using an emotional argument to sway your family will probably be useless.  They are set against your leaving and I don’t think you’ll be able to change their minds.

What will support you in your choice?  Page of Oysters Rx

In your core, you see yourself as a student.  You thrive on learning new things and acquiring knowledge.  In addition, you believe you are practical and grounded with a realistic view of what’s out there in the world.  You may be young but you’re not stupid or naive.  You believe this works in your favor and it seems that your past experiences and scholarly pursuits will serve you well in your academic career.  You consider the world to be your oyster and you’re chomping at the bit to enjoy it.

In summary, you and your family don’t see eye to eye on this matter and probably never will.  It boils down to subsuming your desire for college to their need to keep you close and safe.  Ultimately, only you can decide which option is in your best interests and serves your long term goals.  Best of luck whatever you decide to do.

As any fan of Supernatural is aware, Sam Winchester left his family and attended Stanford University in Palo Alto.  He is offered a scholarship and in the series premiere, we learn he scored a 174 on his LSAT and has a meeting scheduled with Stanford Law School in a few days to discuss his admittance (most likely with another scholarship).  Things don’t work out according to Sam’s plans and at the end of the episode, he leaves Stanford and returns to hunting supernatural monsters with his brother Dean.

John Winchester (Sam’s father) and his brother Dean don’t want Sam to leave for college because they fear they cannot protect him from supernatural creatures.  They know how many monsters lurk in the dark and how dangerous they can be and worry Sam won’t be able to protect himself.  As the series progresses we learn that a powerful demon is interested in Sam and John is aware of this (although he doesn’t reveal this to his sons until much later).  This demon’s interest in Sam endangers anyone he cares about, as is revealed when Sam’s girlfriend Jess is killed the same way his mother died – pinned to the ceiling and burned to death.  Although Sam believes he knows how to protect himself and is aware of what’s out there, the truth is that it was much worse and bigger than he ever imagined.

Despite Sam’s desire for a normal life, the show has shown time and time again over the years that’s just not practical.  The supernatural will always use anyone they care about as a way to hurt the Winchesters.