Tag Archives: Emotional support

Smart choices & a need for community

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Dark Goddess Alchemy

For the last few months I’ve been working my way through the Dark Goddess Tarot Majors, spending two weeks with each card before moving on to the next. Right now I’m working with Brigid/Temperance’s energy. I asked Brigid for guidance to help me forge a path towards better health and she gifted me with Maeve/7 of Cups.

 

Dark Goddess 7 of Cups

I took this to mean that the best way to achieve my desire for improved health is to make better, smarter choices. So I asked Maeve how to achieve this? While focusing on this question I drew two cards from the Sacred Bridges Tarot – 10 of Wheels and 6 of Wheels reversed.

Sacred Bridges 10 of Wheels Sacred Bridges 6 of Wheels

Looking at these cards I was struck by the message that I need to seek support from my community and not get to focused on weighing, measuring and doling out portions. As a friend put it “the Perfect is the enemy of the Good.” I know that feeling. I can get so caught up in doing things the “right” way and I end up frustrated and defeated. This time I’ll try taking baby steps instead of diving into the deep end and almost drowning.

I think this is another reason I decided to rejoin FaceBook. I’m feeling much too isolated right now. I don’t have the flexibility to physically connect with friends. I have spent some time on the phone with a few and will continue to do so but the truth is that FB makes it a lot easier. There are still things about it that irritate me but for now it will be a helpful too. I realized at this year’s Readers’ Studio that I miss connecting with my Tarot friends. To quote Elton John – “it’s lonely out in space” and right now that where I feel as though I’m living – outer space. I feel so disconnected from what is going on in the world around me that it’s not funny. So to keep my sanity and feed my desire for social connections – back on FB I go.

Reach out and touch somebody’s hand – 5 of Duckets (Dark Carnival Tarot)

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Dark Carnival 5 of Duckets

This is the second time I’ve drawn this card this week.  I guess I need to listen to its message more closely.  Looking at the two “ghetto smurfs” (I love this phrase from the Gone in 60 Seconds movie) on this card the one thing that strikes me is that they’re together but not together.  They aren’t touching each other.  The girl has her arms wrapped around herself and the guy, with his foot wrapped in a bandage, is reading what appears to be an arrest warrant.  A 40-ounce bottle rests in the snow alone with other pieces of litter.  The girl seems to be glancing hopefully at a closed door nearby while the guy seems wrapped up in himself.  There is a loneliness and sadness to this card that goes beyond their apparent poverty.  They seem so isolated and disconnected from their world and from each other.  All one would need to do is reach and touch the other and offer comfort but their body language suggests that not going to happen.

It seems that as a society we are more disconnected and isolated.  Although we have perpetual access to each other via cell phones, text messaging and online social media sites, we rarely connect on a physical and human level.  How many people have hundreds of Facebook friends and yet would consider themselves lonely?  How many times do we yearn for a simple hug or comforting touch on the arm and instead we are offered a plethora of platitudes on Facebook?  I think this card serves as a reminder that all we really need to do is reach out and touch somebody’s hand (to quote the song).

I’ve recently found myself pondering this tendency in myself.  Over the years I’ve lost contact with many friends.  Some of this is simply the natural process we often go through as we grow and change, realizing we no longer share interests.  Some of if is because I feel as though I no longer have anything to offer in a relationship.  My world is so narrow that all I have to talk about is caring for the in-laws (okay, that’s a bit of an overstatement but not much).  I also have a tendency to feel as though I’m interrupted people’s lives when I call them. I think I need to make more of an effort to keep connected with friends and loved ones.  If they can’t talk to me then I have to hope they’ll feel comfortable enough to let me know.  Of course this says more about me than anything else.

On another level I think the reversed nature of this card is telling me that even though finances are tight and we are in a physically restrictive environment (we just don’t have the freedom to come and goes as we’d like), hubby and I do have each other.  We do support each other.  We try to give each other much needed breaks and work through our frustrations.  It’s not easy but we manage.  We may not be in the best shape financially but at least we are there for each other and care for each other.  Our shared experiences, even the miserable ones, have created a strong, enduring bond.  That’s the important thing right now.

What is my lesson for today? Queen of Cups R (Whispering & Art Postcard Tarot)

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Ah, the Queen of Cups, my old adversary.  She and I have come a long way over the last two years or so.  I have come to appreciate her gentle strength and loving, supportive nature.  Growing up I associated her type of energy with emotional manipulation, weakness and neediness.  I was unable to see her nurturing and loving energies in a positive light.  It is only as I’ve come to need these energies in my own life that I’ve begun to appreciate and embrace her.

Looking at the Art Postcard Queen of Cups I was struck by the sense that she is telling “Cry on my shoulder.  It’s okay.  I’ll comfort you and help  you through this.”  Her outfit even looks as though its collar would serve as a creditable napkin with which to dry one’s tears.  She seems supportive but not one easily overwhelmed by emotions.  She understands and realizes that every so often, we all need a good cry.  It enables us to cleanse and purge the pain that might otherwise paralyze us.

The Whispering Queen of Cups offers a different perspective.  She bobs in the water, beneath a full moon, holding a chalice in one hand and a white orb in the other.  She seems to be offering us the key to our intuition, our inner wisdom and our emotional nature.  She shows that we can be part of that world without being subsumed in it.  We have the ability to tap into our deep, vast emotional wisdom without allowing ourselves to get swept away by it.  At the same time the water surrounding her reminds us that sometimes it’s easy to allow ourselves to drift along on the tides of our emotions, eventually losing our way because we let ourselves lose control.

I think these lovely ladies are telling me that my lesson today is that sometimes it’s okay to let myself be emotional about the things I’m dealing with in my life.  Sometimes being stoic, strong and silent is helpful but sometimes it just bottles up things that need to be expressed.  Right now I could certainly use the Queen of Cups shoulder to cry on but I find it difficult to let go and cry.  Partly because what I’m dealing with is tough but a lot of people are dealing with difficult situations in their lives.  I feel as though my issues and problems are just not that serious.  And perhaps that is my biggest challenge – believing that my feelings are valid and deserve to be recognized.  At least I do have my hubby, mother, sister to provide emotional support.  My friends are supportive too – the issue is that I still feel guilty crying to them.  Perhaps that is what the Queen of Cups reversed is reminded me of today – that if my friends cannot provide some emotional support when I need it they are close enough to let me know that.  It’s not a sign of weakness on my part and I would hope they feel able to ask the same of me if the occasion ever calls for it.  Another lesson I am learning to integrate into my life.