Today’s chat with the ancestors was a bit of a scolding; a chiding if you will. They’re reminding me that lately I feel like I want to climb out of my own skin; I want to escape from all the stuff in my life – responsibilities, possessions, obligations.
The small figure climbing out if the town in the 10 of Pentacles is facing the blindfolded figure on the 2 of Swords. This suggests she has no clear idea what her next move should be. My ancestors are reminding me that in addition to having a plan, I need to find balance in my life. This is been a recurring theme for the past few months, at a minimum. I think they’re getting a little frustrated with my lack of action in this area.
I think the 5 of Swords is showing me that I sometimes feel trapped in a no win situation but that only remains true if I continue to resist making changes. I keep viewing this as an all or nothing scenario but that isn’t true. If I can make changes in baby steps it should reduce my frustration levels and my need for flight.
Today, over a cuppa @HarneyTea Elyse Blend, I had a chat with my ancestors asking for insight and guidance. Here are their words of wisdom:
“Stop talking through your hat and plodding around in circles. No matter how hard you try, you can’t keep things in stasis. Life is all about change and you can’t prevent it, only control how it impacts your life. So listen to your heart, plot a course that allows you to feel comfortable and grounded, and get moving!”
While enjoying a cuppa Harney & Sons Malachi McCormick blend, I had a chat with the Morrigan, my divine guide when she’s in the mood, Her message today was pretty simple but effective, “If you want that happy ending, to reach that goal of prosperity and abundance, then you need to do the hard work. Keep seeking ways to improve and move forward, and balance what you need to do with what you want to do.” Perhaps not the most earth-shattering message but still a useful smack upside the head.
Today I wondered what lesson I need to learn? Where should I be focusing my energy? I drew:
I need to learn to balance my energy and focus more effectively; blend what I must do with what I want to do. It would also help if I listened to my institution, trusted my inner voice. The truth is I know what to do and how to do it but I need to listen and trust in my inner wisdom; the self-knowledge woven through my soul.
What goal do I have that is stalled because I am overwhelmed? How might I best move forward?
I’m stalled because I still haven’t let go enough to move to the next level; the next phase in my life. I’m spending too much time focusing on the pain and the loss and not enough time focusing on what comes next; what I’ve achieved despite of or even because of the pain and loss.
The best way for me to move forward is to get more realistic and practical about matters. Wishes are wonderful things and can be quite a motivating factor, however they can also easily become a trap. Instead of dreaming about things that are unlikely to happen, such as winning the lottery, now is the time to focus on somewhat more realistic and practical dreams and goals.
This actually ties in quite nicely with yesterday’s reading reminding me that I need to narrow the field a bit because time has become more limited. This is a lot to think about and a lot to work with moving forward.
What belief about yourself no longer serves you? With what can you replace it?
Maybe the belief that no longer serves me is that I still have a lot of unexpressed, untapped potential. The reality is that I’m in my 50s and while I don’t feel old my clock has probably passed the halfway mark. That doesn’t mean I can’t still achieve new goals however it does suggest I need to narrow those goals down to more realistic proportions.
I can replace these myriad goals with more genuine ones; ones that truly fulfill my heart, mind and soul rather than gratifying my ego. I think it’s time for some focused goal setting and practical planning; time to weed through the excess and get to the core of things. Then I can move forward with thoughtfulness and drive.
What do you need to grieve? How might you give yourself the permission you need to do so?
I need to grieve the lack of balance in my life; the loss of freedom and the ability to pursue my interests. There is little equilibrium between obligation and desire; between what I must do and what I want to do. It’s still difficult for me to accept. I know I’m doing the right thing but it’s certainly not my preferred thing.
I just need to move forward and reconnect with people the best way I can. I know I’m on the outside of the flow but that’s not so unusual. So, I need to find different ways to accept support and friendship; to keep connected to others. Facebook would probably be one easy solution but I despise FB so much, that isn’t really an option. I do have the telephone, email, Twitter, Instagram, YouTube and MeWe, but none of these are the same as spending time with friends and loved ones but it’s better than nothing.
I know what will help me grieve and move forward. The challenge now us actually doing it.
Well, I guess the best way to connect with one’s inner child is to focus inward and not let the world’s crazy or personal daily obligations weigh you down. Focusing on the darkness in the world or personal responsibilities that weigh us down only serves to suck the joy out of life. Sometimes it’s necessary, vitally important, even life saving to take a break and focus on yourself.
Now, of course, the same advice I would give to someone else applies just as much to me but I ignore it all the time. It’s starting to show – the wear & tear; the fraying around the edges. So I have to make a commitment to take small blocks of time for myself everyday. I need to re-acquaint myself with me. I need to reread all those wonderful SARK books I own. I need to browse Jennifer Louden’s Woman’s Comfort Book and Woman’s Retreat Book. I know I can do it if I focus. I’ve done it before. Sometimes being stubborn has it’s advantages.
So today I pondered where to focus my attention; my big, juicy brain (sorry, been watching zombie flicks with the hubby). This is the answer I received. Hmph, interesting that these cards are the same suits I drew yesterday. So I’d have to say I still need to focus on exploring and determining what brings me joy and how to express it and use it to fuel my creative energies.
I need to relearn the contours of my own heart – not always an easy task. I have a tendency of doing first and letting introspection fall by the wayside. I often joke that I’m as deep as a babbling brook, but that’s bullshit. It’s more accurate to say although I can be as deep as a babbling brook (I truly am a very WYSIWYG kinda gal), I also have hidden, unplumbed depths. The reversed Queen of Cups is telling me it’s time for some deep diving.
Happiness, joy and emotional satisfaction are amazing but not static. Remember that clear communication is essential to maintaining this state.
Just because thing are good right now doesn’t mean you should ignore warning signs you receive. The assumption that things will always stay the way they are right this minute is a fallacy.
Be cautious and careful about what goes on behind your back. Many smart people have been caught off guard because they left their flank unprotected. Think of the times we’ve seen people brought low right after their greatest triumph, their happiest moment. Don’t take your happiness and emotional satisfaction for granted.