Addendum: External validation

As I was re-reading my earlier post about external validation I realized I have a kink in my nature.  My policy of keeping the boss happy only worked with female bosses.  I was more than happy to find ways to accomplish whatever goals my female supervisors set for me.  We often bonded so that we became friends or at least friendly outside the office as well as during work hours.  However this practice has never been effective with male supervisors.

Whenever I’ve worked with male supervisors I find myself become more assertive, even aggressive.  I find that very often the way male bosses spoke to me or acted towards me triggered negative responses.  Apparently I don’t react well to traditional male supervisory tactics of being told what to do and treated like a grunt and not a team member.  Bumping heads with male bosses has rarely proved beneficial to me and yet I cannot seem to help it.  So apparently my quest for external validation and approval is not as all-encompassing as I previously believed.

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