In light of my reaction to and insights gained from my 3 of Swords moment after the phone conversation with a former co-worker, I had another epiphany. My foundation reading at Readers Studio 2013 (done by the fabulous Nancy Antenucci) was interesting and helpful at the time. My focus was on how I can better see myself as a professional Tarot reader. As I considered the cards drawn (using Julie Cuccia-Watts’ amazing Ma’at Tarot), it hit me that this reading is equally as appropriate and powerful when addressing my termination and the factors that led up to it and the 3 of Swords phone conversation.

The spread was a reversed pyramid with 4 cards at the top and a single card at the bottom. The top layer reflected air or the thoughts that impact/help create the situation. In this reading these cards were all Majors (Temperance, The Tower, The Hanged One and The Emperor). In terms of my position at the NPO Temperance shows that I was trying to merge my personality and skills into the new paradigm and new management at the agency. The Tower is how I felt when I was fired. The Hanged One is the state of suspended animation I’ve been in since it happened. And The Emperor is the former Executive Director who fired me. Post phone call I still see Temperance the same way but not I can add that it represents me trying to forge a new me from the pieces of the old NPO me and the post-NPO me. The Tower now has the added meaning of the phone call and the information I received during it. The Hanged One now represents me changing my perspective on things and getting ready to break free of the cocoon and move forward again. The Emperor is now me enthroned, having reclaimed my own authority and now learned not to give it away to others or let them determine whether I’m good enough or smart enough or skilled enough.

Without going into too much more detail about the remaining levels and how the card meanings are enhanced and amplified by recent experiences, I have to say it was an eye-opening and fun project. I’ve seen the concept of harvesting your journals – reviewing past journal entries and mining them for new insights. Why not do the same with Tarot readings? I’m sure there are lots of folks who already do this but for me this was a new idea. Or perhaps it’s simply that I finally actually made the effort. It makes it a bit more interesting than simply pulling a card every day (although I still do that). In fact the card of the day (COTD) can actually add another layer to the initial reading. This is an idea I want to play with some more.